Ode of a New Bowler

 I’ve come here today to learn how to bowl

With some trepidation but hope in my soul

The people look quite friendly, so I’ll give it a go

I’m sure that they’ll teach me all I should know

You get balls called woods that are made of hard plastic

Which if dropped on your foot the pain would be drastic

There’s a ball called Jack near the end of the carpet

And poor little Jack is everyone’s target

If that is so then please answer this riddle

Why do they put that white block in the middle?

 It’s important to learn before it’s too late

This not-quite-round wood doesn’t roll very straight

It seems that the wood is biased you see

I hope it isn’t just biased against me

Bowl the wood correctly holding your nerve

And by some great miracle it follows a curve

So following instructions I bowl my first bowl

And then want to fall into a great big black hole

I thought that I’d sent it with just the right pace

But it careered off the carpet, disappeared without trace

The person at the far end making some quip

Is standing quite still yet he said he would skip

Why is aforementioned skip just going mental

He shouts that I should have bowled Wide and Gentle

Why is he is ranting, just staring at me

Waving his arms about flashing the V

I’m told that it means that our team’s now holding two

Just don’t mess it up whatever you do.

My next bowl ends up in the right general quarter

Exuberance, joy, the thing did what it oughta

One kind person tells me to no great surprise

I’m sure you will master it with many more tries

I think I’ve grasped bowling but that just depends

Understanding one beginning but playing five ends

Many things are spinning around in my brain

But I have quite enjoyed it, I’ll come back again